The only thing that women have to do to be called a “man hater” is name male violence. That is it, any analysis they might have is brushed aside for being too “angry” or too narrowly focused.But when was the last time you heard a man called “woman hater”? Even when men are abusive, or rapists, or johns, or even when they kill women, they are not given that label. His actions are typically explained away, or at worse shoved to the fault of his victim.
It’s getting easier and easier to talk about mental illness with other people. I think it will always be weird with my parents (talking about anything really personal with them is weird) but with friends it’s getting better. A few weeks ago I was chatting with my best friend and a couple of friends who had known I’d been having issues and my best friend mentioned a few details I’d only mentioned to her and I was slightly surprised but also fine with it and she knew me well enough to know I’d be alright with them knowing.
I’ve also been talking more with another group of friends who I know have all been in therapy or on medication for something at some point. It’s really comforting to chat enough to see it not as an end of the world, hugely embarrassing secret but as something that just happens to people. It’s nice to sit with people and have the conversation sway towards experiences with anti-depressants or panic attacks and not have my heart pounding with anxiety over it.